“Can you give me the deets as to why this (a man saying he wants a woman to build with him) is a red flag in your eyes, please?”
People have trouble with dating because they don’t realize that the way men and women are socialized is objectively different.
Men also have 20x more testosterone than women do.
Men ALSO don’t contend with the hormonal roller-coaster, an infradian rhythm.
It’s a red flag because it’s priming you for low standards before you’re even together.
Low standards (especially in dating) is a way we women abandon ourselves.
“I want a woman who’s gonna build with me.”
What someone with discernment would be able to deduce from this:
This man does not have any resources and he's in survival mode because of it
Not only is he broke, but he’s stingy because he’s making his lack of resources your problem as a woman.
He has no self-respect because why would you be sharing this with a woman you barely know (but also, thank God he is so you can leave)?
He feels entitled (to women’s labor and energy and bodies) because, in a society where women will sacrifice EVERYTHING for a man, he’s also expecting you to build with him.
Of course, you already knew this.
YOU struggle with getting your body to understand what your brain already knows.
You only obsess over your manifestations because your body doesn’t realize it’s already yours.
The only reason you exhaust yourself in dating is that your body doesn’t know that your dream man exists and is actively on his way to find you.
The only reason you’re working so hard, grinding away your softness, is that your body doesn’t yet understand that softness was always meant for you—and it can start now.
You body has mechanisms in place to protect you, and the activation or shut down you feel is your body’s way of keeping you safe—so don't be too hard on her, please.
Still, it's time to train her so she's on board: you get to enjoy your dream life—and it doesn't have to be complicated, and it doesn't have to happen a year from now, and it doesn't have to come when you're finally enough for it.
You were born enough.
Sign up for the Feminine Healing for Elevated Women masterclass!
Because of how the platform I’m using to host it works, I can only take 90 women for free, so sign up ASAP!
See you soon Gem!
I feel so silly for not knowing this or realizing it but you just saved my life thank you so much